You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
