I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
