Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
