Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
