The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
