"it" just moved
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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