So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I don't think brook has ever known best
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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