There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
