I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Pants are for mortals
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
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