The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
