let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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