I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize
