no. you can't hotbox the world.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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