why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
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