I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
i think im in europe. pls send help
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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