I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
