i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
