question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
