I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
we're so committed to being not committed
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
