Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Randomize
