Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Randomize