you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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