so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Randomize
