Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
you traded sex for a burrito?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
