the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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