OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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