Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
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