Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
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