Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize