My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
