That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
