can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
You're a waste of cheezeits
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
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