I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Randomize
