just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize
