I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
