Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
