I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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