Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
