The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
