when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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