Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
