love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Randomize
