You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
this boner is exhausting
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
