What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
