you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
