I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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