Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
