ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
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