i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I need to wash the frat house off of me
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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