Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
